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Dear DrDriving,
I'm a 16 year old boy
and I was driving in tandem with a friend who is unfamiliar with
driving in that area and on the freeway. It was almost midnight and
we were driving to our homes. I had a friend from work who invited
us to a party but we couldn't find his place so we drove back. I
lost the address and all we did was drive around then started to go
home. We did not have anything to drink and nobody had taken any
drugs.
We got onto the
freeway and while we were driving, a black SUV pulled up really fast
and close behind my friend's car-who was in the center lane. I was
in the left lane and wanted to stay close to my friend so he would
not get lost. The SUV swerved around my friend's car to the slow
lane and went past really fast. He started to swerve around all the
other cars ahead of us and we thought he was gone.
A little bit later he
was held up in the traffic and my friend and I were both in the left
lane and passed him. My friend and I had to change to another
freeway that had only two lanes for a while. The SUV took the same
exit and my friend and I thought it was funny that he was behind us
and we slowed down in both of the lanes (stupid plan). He pulled up
behind me and then behind my friend and began pointing a gun. We got
really scared and did everything we could to get away. He followed
us really fast but never tried to pass us. This went on for miles.
We were all swerving through traffic. I think I was driving about 90
miles an hour. Sometimes we thought he was gone and then we would
see that he was just kind of hiding behind other cars. We got close
to our exit and I started to flash my lights and honk at my friend
so that he knew to take the exit. When we took the exit we saw the
SUV follow us then pull over on the off-ramp.
When we got onto the
road we were met by lots of police cars.
We ended up with tickets for reckless driving and we are going to
plead not guilty. We think that this
driver did
something illegal and could have caused an accident. We know that we
were stupid and added to the problem but we think that he's an adult
and he was the one who was making it into a battle. What do you
think? Do you have any suggestions how to handle this? Thanks.
The
letter above was published in our
Road Rage and Aggressive Driving
book and used as an exercise called Scenario Analysis.
The Chart below
identifies the specific chain of steps that together make up this
road rage incident. There are 13 bad driving behaviors these two
teenagers performed in sequence, as evidenced by their own
description of the events (middle column). Your comments should
answer two questions: (a) how does each step contribute to their
trouble (focus on the bold words in column 2), and (b) how could
they have backed out of it at each step by doing something else.
Have your friends or family members also complete the exercise, then
get together to compare and discuss everybody's solutions. Doing
this exercise will strengthen your emotional intelligence as a
driver by making you more aware of how your behavior influences
other people's behavior on highways.
|
Scenario Analysis
of Teen Drivers' Unrecognized Road Rage Behavior |
|
Emotionally challenged behavior |
Segment from the letter |
State how each step contributes to
trouble. |
Suggest smarter behavior. |
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1. Playing games on the
highway. |
"I'm a 16 year old boy
and I was driving in tandem with a friend." |
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2. Driving after curfew
|
"It was almost midnight" |
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3. Losing the address and
going anyway |
"I lost the address and
all we did was drive around then started to go home" |
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4. Driving abreast
occupying center lane and fast (left) lane |
"I was in the left lane
and wanted to stay close to my friend--who was in the center
lane" |
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5. Blocking the way so
the SUV had to pass in the right (slow) lane |
"SUV pulled up really
fast and close behind my friend's car-who was in the center
lane" |
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6. Discounting the
seriousness of the incident |
"we thought he was gone" |
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7. Not realizing they
were doing something provocative |
"My friend and I were
both in the left lane and passed him" |
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8. Not realizing that the
incident has now escalated into a potential duel
|
"The SUV took the same
exit and my friend and I thought it was funny that he was behind
us" |
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9. Finally realizing this
is trouble but still acting like they're in a duel, escalating
the fight instead of backing down |
"we slowed down in both
of the lanes (stupid plan). He pulled up…and began pointing a
gun." |
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|
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10. Engaging in reckless
driving--weaving through traffic at high speeds getting away
from a chase |
"We got really scared and
did everything we could to get away. He followed us really fast
but never tried to pass us. This went on for miles. We were all
swerving through traffic. I think I was driving about 90 miles
an hour" |
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11. Engaging in further
provocative behavior by ignoring its potential effect on the
pursuer |
"I started to flash my
lights and honk at my friend so that he knew to take the exit" |
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12. Trying to diffuse
their own responsibility in the sequence of events, as a sort of
denial |
"We think that this
driver did something illegal and could have caused an accident" |
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13. Hiding behind
inadmissible excuses, avoiding to admit what they did wrong, and
refusing to think objectively about it |
"We know that we were
stupid and added to the problem but we think that he's an adult
and he was the one who was making it into a battle" |
|
|
We also want to show this
email exchange:
Hi Pedro,
Thanks for writing about the scenario analysis exercise in our book. We'd like to answer
you in detail, considering each one of your points:
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
From Pedro@aol.com
Date: Tue, 12 Dec 2000
To: DrDriving@DrDriving.org
Subject: In your book on p. 206
TWO TEENAGED DRIVERS GETTING INTO TROUBLE
DrDriving, In the section about "unrecognized teenage road rage behavior"
(Or something
to the effect), you have a checklist about what they did wrong. I strongly disagree with
you about all the points until the two slow down in front of the black SUV.
1. Since when is "driving in tandem" synonymous with "playing games on
the highway." Truck drivers drive in "tandem," me and my brother drove in
"tandem" when we moved cross country, whenever my family goes to do things
together we drive in "tandem." I guess we should all stop "playing games on
the highway"
** We grant you that following one another could be legitimate in
some circumstances, like this one. Perhaps we thought they were driving neck to neck in
parallel lanes--when we wrote this analysis. If you look at step 5, it appears that the
two young men are driving parallel to each other when the SUV comes up behind.
*********************************
2. The time of day that these two were out is irrelevant. Many areas, thankfully, do
not have curfews. Your point of the two being out past curfew is further made irrelevant
because, had these two been adults, you would not have mentioned the time of day. Licensed
law-abiding drivers have equal entitlement to be on the road regardless of age.
** Generally speaking you are correct, but in this case we're
dealing with teen drivers. The driver who wrote says he is 16 and this age group is not
treated the same way as 18 and beyond. Graduated licensing laws are especially addressed
to this age group. This age group has the highest rate of crashes than any other.
Fatalities in car crashes are the leading cause of death for individuals 1 to 23.
*********************************
3/4. Just because someone doesn't immediately know where they're going doesn't mean
that they are "emotionally challenged," I shouldn't have to give up and go home
because I forgot directions and if I want to spend the rest of the night driving around
(within the confines of the law) than I should be allowed.
** Yes, you do have that legal right. But here we're talking
about learning how to behave reasonably in the eyes of mature people, the law, what's
expected as normal by the community, and so on. So it's important and adaptive to make
inquiries before you go somewhere unfamiliar. Yes, you have the right to keep looking, not
asking, being unsure and unprepared, driving around without a specific purpose or
desitnation, and so on. But these behaviors will lead you into trouble and you need to
know this in advance so you give yourself the choice of doing it or not.
*********************************
5. You say that it was wrong of the center lane driver to hold up the SUV and make him
go to the right. I can't count the number of times that someone will zigzag through
traffic and come up right behind me. By the time I put on my signal to get over, they have
already cut over. I can just imagine what would have happened if I had moved over at the
same time they did especially if the don't slow down to accommodate the possibility that I
would. This driver had every right to be in that lane and shouldn't have to risk himself
and everyone else around him to "jump" out of the way of an **#@ driver. You
also get on the one for driving in the left lane. Is driving in the left lane against the
law? Did he even have a chance to move to accommodate this **#@? What was he doing wrong?
** It's important to make a distinction between what is illegal
behavior and what is emotionally unintelligent behavior. You feel that if some behavior is
not illegal then it's all right to do it. But in fact, some behavior may not be illegal,
but if some accident or crash develops, that behavior can be found to be a contributory
factor. Yes, it's important you consider whether something is morally correct or
emotionally intelligent? Many young drivers have difficulty learning this rule of conduct.
Driving in parallel isn't safe or prudent. Driving in the left lane except to pass isn't
appropriate when it results in other cars having to switch lanes and pass from the right
or middle lane.
** Also, the emotion you're displaying by calling the other
driver an insulting or obscene name should serve to you as a flag that you need to think
this through more carefully, or what we would say, with more emotional intelligence. This
will protect you and the people around you whom you could harm in a fit of rage that you
later regret. Please continue to read our book and do the exercises. Then write back a
little later and see if you then agree with us.
*********************************
6. You say that they underestimated the problem they created, something to the effect
of "we thought he was gone," Everytime some **#@ cuts around me I should get
scared and worried that he's going to hurt me? They didn't create this problem, the guy in
the SUV did.
** You're asking if you should worry every time another driver
cuts around you. The answer is Yes. You can call it being scared or worrying, but you can
also call it being prudent, cautious, competent. You need to remind yourself all the time
you're driving that the cars around you are driven by human beings who act and react, and
their action and reaction are vital information for you to keep track of all the time.
Driving takes mental effort when it's done right. It takes mental presence, which includes
full and continuous awareness of where the other drivers are, what they're doing and might
be doing. This way you can be supportive of them, helping them do what they want by
staying out of their way nad emotional fury. This is emotionally intelligent. And it's
your best way to keep in control of the situation. The two teenaged drivers in our
analysis lost control of the situation and got into trouble. They didn't like it.
*********************************
7. They get criticized for going past him in the left lane. Provoking him? I also can't
count the number of times that the example in #5 goes around me to the right or left and
hits the wall of traffic in that lane and I end up going past him. Should I slow down my
entire lane so that I don't go past him and hurt his feelings?
Also I can laugh at every jack ass who zips in and out of traffic in a usually futile
attempt to get ahead, that doesn't mean that I've created a problem, also that guy
couldn't see them laughing. I guess these two teen should have started crying and gotten
off the road as soon as possible because some guy was driving like a prick.
** Yes, passing him in the left lane is like provoking him. You
need to be aware of what provokes another driver so you can then avoid doing that
behavior. In this case, they were already in a duel or contest, and so their passing him
could easily be taken by the SUV driver as a further step in the duel or contest. In fact,
as you can see next, that is how he reacted.
** You do not know if he could see them laugh or not, and maybe
they gave out other cues. The point is that their attitude was unintelligent and landed
them in trouble by hiding reality and lulling them into foolish behavior.
*********************************
8. The left lane driver flashed his lights at his friend not the guy behind him. The
**#@ was behind both of them. I've had to lead people who are new to the area to the right
exits, I describe the exit as best I can, but when we get near the exit I flash them to
confirm that this is the one. My brother and I used our Flash-to-pass to signal when we
need gas or a break, etc. Are we supposed to worry that everyone else around us is going
to mistake our signal or take it the wrong way?
** Yes. You must take on responsibility for the consequences of
your actions on others around you. Emotional intelligence is to know how others will or
might react to our actions and take steps to avoid in such a way. We are a community of
drivers on the highway and we drive as teamwork. Recognizing this principle is emotional
intelligence.
*********************************
9. Now is when I believe that they escalated the problem, they shouldn't have slowed
the **#@ down. But regardless the guy SHOULD NOT!!!!!! have brandished a weapon. This
shows that he was ready for a conflict with someone and unfortunately these two were the
ones he had the conflict with. He also demonstrated throughout this ordeal that he was not
in control of his emotions.
** Correct. It's also very important for you to realize that the
two teenaged drivers could have avoided this trouble. The purpose of our exercise is to
help you realize this. Please go through it again and this time you can fill out the other
two columns.
*********************************
10. If someone pulls a gun on me in traffic, I will go as fast as I can safely go to
avoid them.
I showed your book and this story to about 30 people, all ages. None of them can
understand what the hell you are talking about (basically implying that teens were at
fault for the whole thing) until step 9 when they slow the guy down. But that's the only
time that we could see a problem with the teens' driving. We all agree that the guy in the
SUV would have conflicted with somebody and that ONLY thing that the teens' shouldn't have
done was slow him down
** Talking about this with your friends is an excellent thing to
do. It shows you're really interested in this topic. We urge you to do the exercise again,
then discuss the whole thing with your friends again. This time however, you'll be able to
promote the emotionally intelligent alternatives, and thereby help your friends gain in
emotionally intelligence. Please write again and tell us what
happened!
Aloha,
Leon James and Diane Nahl
DrDriving.org |
RoadRageous Video Course at AIPS
-- see clips or register
How long can we continue as a
society when we kill each other on highways at an annual rate five times greater than wars
have killed our soldiers since the beginning of the century? This year
at least 40,000
people will lose their lives on our highways and more than 3 million will go the hospital
with injuries and economic losses of over 200 billion dollars. Psychologically, motorists
are at war with each other. In 1999 more than a dozen states passed aggressive driving
laws and law enforcement around the country has stepped up various initiatives to curb
aggressive drivers. The workplace is directly affected as employee productivity and
satisfaction suffers from what they call the number one daily concern: aggressive driving.
Teenagers are at risk. Children and the next generation of drivers are at risk. 
Video Module 1: What Makes us RoadRageous
SOLUTIONS FOR AGGRESSIVE DRIVING
AMERICAN INSTITUTE FOR PUBLIC SAFETY